


Remember that one time?

by Blackwidowislyfe



Series: They say the first day is always the hardest [8]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, But in my defense I was super depressed when i wrote it so, Drug Use, Drugs, F/F, Gen, Hallucinations, If I find another warning I will add it, Kidnapping, Like I said this one is not pretty, Mild torture, Non-Consensual Bondage, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Non-Sexual Bondage, This one is also not pretty, Threats, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Threats of Violence, Threats of sexual slavery, mentions of purging, trigger warning, ya know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-16
Updated: 2015-09-16
Packaged: 2018-04-21 00:34:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4808138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blackwidowislyfe/pseuds/Blackwidowislyfe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha is kidnapped after a run. What ensues afterwards may very well break her all over again.</p>
<p>PLEASE HEED THE WARNINGS PEOPLE</p>
            </blockquote>





	Remember that one time?

**Author's Note:**

> You there! STOP. Scroll up and read the tags. You done? Okay, then you understand why this gets a BIG FAT TRIGGER WARNING. If you chose not to, let me inform you what lies ahead: Threats of rape/non-con, threats of violence, non-consensual drugging, kidnapping, attempted rape/non-con, torture, glossed over purging. I literally threw in everything I could end it is a bit of a cliff-hanger, so don't kill me for it.
> 
> I suppose I should explain why I wrote this like I did. Sigh. Long story short I was dealing with a lot of emotional pain over something outside of my control. I think I have warned everyone properly, but if not, just leave me a comment and I will fix it. The only reason I did not stick the rape/non-con warning on here was because everything was ATTEMPTED, but never actually GOT VERY FAR. Seriously, this gets really heavy really quick. If it's too much, I would sit this one out. But if you can't, like always, I will put a synopsis at the end.

The first time she was lucky. Phil had known where they were. The worst thing that had happened was Natasha had pissed herself. No one had laid a finger on them, and they went home all sunshines and rainbows.

 

This time she wasn't so lucky.

 

She had gone out for a run. Not that she didn't like the treadmill or the track that SHIELD gyms offered, but she wanted to explore, and breathe something other than air conditioning. Her therapist suggested it. In between torture sessions, she reminded to tell her therapist to go fuck herself because that was the last time she was listening to the crazy bitch. She was currently having an internal melt down, and Red Room training was warring with SHIELD counseling advice and she honestly felt like her head was about to explode.

 

Something that kept running inside was the urges to self destruct. But she had started training with Clint (Against protocol, but her whole existence was against protocol, so), and if one thing kept her going, it was his words, "Do what keeps you alive the longest."

 

Funny, she didn't seem to see how forcing herself to purge what little was inside her stomach fit into that. Another reason to tell her therapist to fuck off. Still, it settled her enough to get her to just think  _clearly._  And right now she had to survive. She had to, if only long enough to escape or kill the bastards, whichever came first. She didn't think about Clint. He could be looking for her, but she couldn't take that chance. She was on her own, in a strange place with strange things, and she had no idea what they wanted. Well.

 

She got her first chance to figure that out when they dragged her, hissing and screaming, out of her cell sometime after she fell asleep. She had no idea what they were going to do to her, but it had to be better than what they did last time, which was drug her and stick her in that damn cell to panic.

 

_Strong,_  she reminded herself.  _You are strong, if nothing else. You can bend, but you won't break._  She was shoved into a chair, and strapped down and left alone. That was better than it could have been. She started counting.

 

At 7,802, someone came in. He was horrible looking, had a balding head and a glass eye. Not too far from a pirate. He had a gun, and he set it on the table between them, along with a syringe full of unknown liquid.

 

"Natalia," He said in Russian. They didn't know she spoke English then. Good.

 

"What do you want you imbecile," She responded back in her native language.

 

"I'd watch my temper if I were you," He responded back sharply, but with an edge of calmness. "I don't want to have use my little friends here, but I will if I have to. Now then, I don't appreciate what your little friends did last time I captured you and the bird." So she was right before.

 

A hand stroked her red locks. She'd be shaving her head now when this was done. "Natalia, I know you know things. Things that I myself would like to know. Wouldn't it just be simpler if you taught me and we could go, and no one would be harmed in the process?"

 

"How do I know you'll keep your word?" She asked, her hands twisting and turning in their little binds. No good, they were secure, and she was out of practice with escaping from bondage. "How do I know you won't kill me once I give you what you want?"

 

"Oh believe me Natalia, you are the first female that has been dragged in here in ages. I would not worry about death. Slavery.... A much more likely outcome." She shuddered. Twisted men had twisted kinks. She'd learned that the hard way too many times. Each one promised to be gentle and yet-

 

"NATALIA!" He was inches from her face, and she could see an old scar that had faded on his neck. "Listen closely. If you want this to go easy, you will wait in your cell like the good girl you are. You will not whine, or whimper, or make a fool of yourself like you did the last time. Understood?"

 

She nodded with a gulp. So he knew. "And you would be wise to not let it happen at all. Some men.... Well, best you not find out." She was sedated, and when she woke up, she was in that stupid fucking cell again.

 

God. Okay, take stock, She instructed herself. No broken bones or bruises. Nothing hurt except her throat, which was to be expected. She saw food on the floor. Not a lot, but enough. She hesitated. She would need to make it last, in case this was her only meal. But she also needed to put as much in her as she could if she had to.... take care of things again.

 

_No, you are strong,_ she reminded herself. So she ate. Slowly. She tried not to think about it and let her mind wander back to SHIELD. She specifically thought of Maria Hill. She wondered if the woman was looking for her. What traces she would find, if any. She wondered if the woman was worried. It was about that time she realized said woman was standing in front of her. Huh.

 

"You know you're going crazy." God, she must really be losing it to hallucinate. "I'm not real."

 

"I know," She says softly, weakly. "I'm still glad you're here though."

 

Maria smiled brightly, and that was that. They talked, of horrible things Natasha had endured, and how this was nothing, and how many times she had beaten Clint at arm wrestling when her cell was suddenly flooded with gas. Maria coughed, trying to reassure Natasha as she passed out.

 

* * *

 

When she woke up the next time, she was back in the chair. No, actually, this one was different. Metallic features with mild upholstery in the back. This could only get worse.

 

"You lied." This time in English. Great. "You lied you little bitch you. And now you are going to get your punishment like the little SLUT you are!"

 

Natasha whimpered. This was so bad. He growled, and forcefully attacked her lips. She knew this drill. This was one thing that she knew enough about to know not to fight. Next he wound his fingers in her hair, running his fingers gently through them. Sheesh! It was about then that he decided he should fondle (And by fondle I mean painfully squeeze) her breasts, when he backed off.

 

"Son of a bitch," He panted, pressing a hand to his ear. "Yes I am AWARE! Stall them! I'll have to finish this myself." He backs off, going to the table. "I really hoped I wouldn't have to do this, but since Duty calls and all that..."

 

Her mouth goes dry, and she can hear crackling above her head. She whimpers, struggling to get free when finally, the door gets forcefully shot to the ground, and suddenly all you can see and hear is light.

 

* * * *

 

It's not so bad here,  _She thinks. She watches her memories go by, in a whirl. Everything that has ever happened to her. How Clint has made her laugh, how Maria braided her hair... Her family.... And suddenly she's at the beginning, seeing her Papa for the first time.... And then the lights fade..._

 

* * * *

 

"NATASHA!" Maria Hill screams. "Oh God oh God oh God Tasha please come back PLEASE!"

 

"Agent Hill," It's Clint. No amount of brainwashing could erase him from her mind. "Oh God. PHIL! WE NEED A MEDIC!" She sees the woman crying over her, holding her to her chest, whispering.

 

"I'm sorry! We should have been faster Tasha oh I love you so much please I don't care what happens just come back."

 

* * * *

 

_"I'm here," She tries to say. Everything feels slippery, especially words. "I love you." But it won't come and all she can feel is a massive headache. Suddenly the crying woman is gone and so is Clint and Phil and she's left, drifting._

**Author's Note:**

> SYNOPSIS FOR THOSE WHO CHOSE TO SKIP: Natasha gets kidnapped, and slightly tortured. She also has an imaginary conversation with Maria Hill, and then things get real. She is put in the same chair that they stick Bucky/The Winter Soldier in, and then she is drifting....
> 
> Next one is more recovery and happy-ish side of things. I honestly never intended for things to get this dark and twisted when I started, but here we are. :P Sorry about this!


End file.
